Man, I bet you're not at all tired of us giving you updates about stuff you can buy from our store. And that's good! ...because we've got some more updates about stuff you can buy from our store. We also intended to have a picture of the space so you could compare Real Life to that drawing Jimbo made for you last week, but Jared forgot to take that picture because he's a bonehead (and somehow there are even fewer lights inside the brewery now, so there's not much to show you on that front). But I digress. On to the Store News: we finally got our tulips! We'd intended to have these ready for you at the same time as the billy glasses, but there were some issues with the printing that aren't really worth getting into right now. Now it's several weeks and one redesign later, and we've got a hella handsome glass for you to enjoy! This style of tulip is a staff favorite around here at Bone Up Headquarters, so hopefully you'll get as much drinking pleasure from them as we do. Bodacious! These tulips are - for real this time - the last thing we're planning on adding to the store, at least until we're open to the public later this year. We've got some ideas of what we'll be offering once that time rolls around, but if you've got something that would particularly tickle your fancy, please don't hesitate to let us know (PS, we're almost sold out of our first printing run of Men's Large T-Shirts, so you'd better act soon if you want to be one of the "cool kids" who "did it first." We've got more on the way, but those won't be First Printing). We also got a bunch of those things that you put your glass on, but we're not selling those because why would we
The ol' brewhouse may be snowed in with the rest of Boston, but there's plenty of research (drinkin') to be conducted while we wait for warmer days. While there's no hard news to report this week, Jimbo drew you this here picture for your eyes. Enjoy!
Now, I know what you've been thinking:* "it sure is great that I can buy Bone Up glassware in order to impress people at my next elegant dinner party, but how can I show the world that I'm a classy sophisticate when I'm out and about?" Well never you worry, we've got the answer to your problem right here with some brand-spankin'-new Bone Up T-shirts! We did some extensive research** on different T-shirts before we picked these out, so we're confident that these will be perfect for any occasion - from meeting your in-laws for the first time to sitting around alone and eating ranch dressing straight out of the tub with your finger. Go check them out! Now you don't have any excuse to hold your dinner parties topless (though if you do, maybe you should invite us?). *Since last week? I guess?
**We use a process that I like to call "wearing T-shirts all the time always." To the casual observer, it's indistinguishable from regular ol' good taste in clothing. Oh man, have we got some excitement for you. You know how we've been hinting for weeks that Bone Up merchandise was just around the corner? Well, we have turned that corner, and it is glorious. At the moment our selection is limited to two different types of pint glasses, but we've got some T-shirts and some more glassware hot on their heels.
But! One of the two glasses we've got for sale right now is a limited-edition small-run bit o' joy that may never again see the light of day once we run out. Sure, they're just shaker pints, which might not be as sexy as stemmed tulips or Billy pints, but buying one of these will show the world that you're one Rad Duderino (note to editor: check with an actual "hep cat" to get the "down low" on the "jive lingo" that "all the kids are using these days"). OK fine. I'll admit it. We bought like two cases because we wanted to test the quality from the manufacturer (and because we wanted some tax-deductible Christmas presents to give out). And the quality is great! But calling them "limited edition" just makes me feel so cool. And besides, we probably won't be offering these exact glasses again, so you should probably buy as many as you can. Unless, you know, you don't feel like being cooler than everybody else. |
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May 2024
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